Monday, November 16, 2015


I begin to find it amusing rather than upsetting when people start to drift apart and become "strangers again". I have always said it here in my site to never forget and to always cherish those who were always at your side during the toughest times but sometimes things happen and you have no choice but to try to forget them.

I, for one have this one person whom I thought was genuinely real in showing his care, concern, or affection (I no longer know which is which). Honestly, it made me feel so secured and safe. While he healed, I too healed. The companionship has been favorable to both and I am thankful. And then one day, just like that... I no longer knew who he is and I can no longer look at him the way I did when we were together, when I left him and when we decided to become friends. Painful as it may seem, people change, people grow...and most of the time people grow apart...people move on.

On that part, I am lost, hurt and confused maybe because I am losing a big part of myself for good and for real... and I am having a hard time digesting that fact. Part of me says, I am happy that finally he is getting what he deserves and part of me is really really upset.

Messages no longer came, I no longer have the courage to send any like the old days, if there may be some... replies came almost forever.  I can no longer feel the same comfort and warmth. It's now plain awkwardness and silence...I can no longer be myself and laugh the loudest in his company... I guess that's the reason why I am hurt.

Oh well, atleast I can start being with myself. It may be hard to be alone but I'd rather enjoy on my own than be with people who no longer wants my company or be with random people for the sake of having company. Opppsss, atleast I have these few good friends who check on me from time to time. God is still good!

Sooo confused,


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